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Hey, first of all, I want to point out that this post is going to be... Peculiar. I don't usually like to open up to others, but this is going to be very therapeutic. I also want to emphasize that I believe (or at least I try to believe) in hope, which is why, although this post may not be the happiest, it won't necessarily be a depressing one (I try to fight against those negative feelings and for now I'm doing pretty well I think).
Let's start from the beginning. I'm not a special person like those who become famous due to their heroic stories or their lives full of challenges, no, actually I would say I'm quite a privileged person: I've access to a good education, I don't have much of a problem with money and, I might sound egocentric, but I am a person who is already quite successful in an academic sense for his age. (this is when you ask yourself "Wait, how old is this guy??", sorry dude, I'm 16, you're listening to the problems of a teenager, a privileged teenager xD).
So where is the problem?? Well, there really isn't just one problem, as I like to say, if it were that simple, we wouldn't be talking about it. I will try to synthesize my ideas in a way that is easy for the reader, but I don't promise anything.
First of all, anxiety has me on the brink of collapse. I don't have time to be a person, mainly for two reasons: I have a lot of responsibilities (I know many people have more), and I don't allow myself to disconnect. Regarding studies, languages are difficult (中文非常难), double degrees consume all my time, and scholarships are stressful. If we talk about disconnection, well, I get nauseated just thinking about it, even if I want and need to rest, I don't allow it, because it hurts me a lot (I'm a productivity junkie, how funny :D).
If we talk about more specific problems, well, I would point out that my social and love life has been quite "special", and I have had to deal with depression, drugs (I want to emphasize that I don't use drugs, that would be hitting rock bottom, and would make me feel like complete shit) and suicide attempts in my environment... It's no fun having to beg the other person to drop the fucking pills.
I would also point out that I hate being at home (I think that's why I like studying so much, because it allows me to disconnect from my problems). I'm tired of being humiliated almost daily. I don't want to look like a victim, I've never liked that role, even less the martyr, but I don't think I deserve this. Below I will offer a little list of some of the words and other things that I have to deal with on a regular basis:
​

You are stupid, a constant disappointment, a clown (just like your girl), self-centered, a toxic person, the worst thing that has ever happened to me. If you're still in this house it's because I can't kick you out. You have no heart, you're just an insolent bum. You don't do anything right... You're good for nothing. I never want to see you again...

​
It's a lot of fun, don't you think? Ha, now I remember the other day when I almost had to sleep in the street because they were going to throw me out of the house at 11 pm. I think it's obvious why I don't feel comfortable with them, although I try daily to meet their expectations to... Not end up even worse.
I want to emphasize that not everything is bad. Writing and music make me feel alive, learning drives me crazy, I love popular science and sports (years ago I was pretty good, I won many championships, now I'm flabby, I don't have time or motivation). And of course this community also helps me A LOT.
Now I need to keep studying, there's a lot of work to do. If you've read all this, I hope I haven't wasted too much of your time. Hope you have a nice day, we all deserve to have a nice day. Keep fighting, champ ;).

there are 140 million homes in USA
and by my est. 315 M oz gold held by Americans (Fort Know not incl). Plus max 2 billion ounces silver.
Simple math can suggest us. If 100 mil homes will be equiv to gold, its 3.2 oz gold/avg home.
If 40M homes will be equiv to silver = 2B/40M = 50 oz silver for avg home.
Unless of course, americans will trade homes for something else......... pfizer shares? bank of america shares? coal? copper?

In the galaxy those specie's whom achieve space travel are usually divided into two types, prey and predator species. The predator species tended to be scavengers, loners, pirate's and mercenaries. The predators having evolved with tendencies to work alone or in small packs, though dominating as apex predators of their respective home worlds. Prey species on the other hand evolved with tendencies to form large groups/communities. Helping and protecting each other as they lived. The prey species made a alliance with other prey species. To work together, share resources, and help protect against the pirates and scavengers. When humans achieved space travel word spread quickly about this new species, a predator species with violent tendencies that triumph some of the most violent and vicious predator pirates and scavengers. And yet, the entire galaxy was caught off guard when the humans asked to join the prey species and their alliance. The prey were cautious, fearing that this might be a trap from a predator species, but the humans were kind, peaceful, and eager to help the alliance. The other predator species mocked, threatened, and showed general disgust towards humans as they learned of humanities attempt to join the prey alliance. In the galactic year XX92, after much debate and investigation, humanity was voted and inducted into the galactic alliance. The following year a few of the predator species created a pirate coalition and declared war on the xiatuians, a avian prey species. The galactic alliance started sending aid, military help, and safe havens for the refugees. Though against a never before seen coalition between predators, the alliance was struggling to keep the pirates at bay. Never having had to fight so many of them at once, the alliance was stretched thin and lacked experience against a collective enemy. That was until humanity stepped up with their military might. The Earth Galactic Navy. It was one of the largest military force that any species has ever seen. The predator species that showed themselves to be peaceful to the alliance in order to join was anything but when thrust into a state of war. Humanity asked the alliance to pull back all forces and allow them to deal with the pirates themselves. The alliance didn't know if humanity was insane and suicidal or confident and brave, though some say it's all the same. The pirates were pushed back, away from alliance space. Ship by ship the pirates coalition was destroyed. But the humans didn't stop there. Pushing all the way to one of the predator species home world, the emantix, humans bombarded the world's surface until nothing was left but a smoldering rock floating in space. A message was given to all predator species. To any remaining pirates, scavengers, loners, isolationists, and mercenaries this message was given to them. "Act against the galactic alliance and you too will burn. Either join us or die. " Galactic year XX94 marked the end of the pirate coalition and their war. Galactic year XX95 and the alliance voted and inducted their second predator species into the galactic alliance. A species that resembled what the humans called a "lizard", some earth animal apparently. The Arazqi as they are called, vetted and approved by humanity, became stead fast allies towards all in the alliance. By the galactic year XX99 more than 12 predator species were voted in and inducted into the galactic alliance. All were once enemies of the alliance, now grew to be stead fast allies. Humanity changed everything we knew about politics, war, peace, predator and prey. To think, a predator species was able to bring about so much change and peace.

• from the desk of galactic alliance ambassador venaxi of the Aroria. Galactic year X138

So I spoke about getting turned down by another girl this week in an earlier post.
She said she sadly can't shoot some pool with me this weekend.
I won't bother texting her with:
Alright, let me know when you're available
Because I'll clearly look desperate/like a simp if I ask her this.
Obviously, if she liked me she would've said: yes.
This clearly isn't the first girl who's rejected me, though I fucking give up.
This shit is so fucking tiring and frustrating, Sweet Jesus Christ...
I hate to sound defeatist, though I don't think I should bother trying to get to know and date anyone anymore.
I guess I'm just too ugly for a woman to like me.
I think my teeth are screwing me over, they're white, though they're a bit far apart from each other, I have to wait months for my next dentist's appointment....
Yet, I met a man almost a year ago when I was still back home (he wasn't rich and his teeth are arguably similar to mine) though he was very chill/down to earth and married to a pretty kind and beautiful woman and they have 4 kids!
Though the man I mentioned is white, he has a career and earns a good amount of money, while I'm a foreign college student who only has a part-time job and loves to hit the gym and play guitar
Maybe this (and my teeth might still be worse than his) are the reasons why I can't get any girl to like me, though as mentioned earlier: I need to wait months for my next appointment with my denstist
I also tried to get a pet to help combat the loneliness, though I'm not allowed to thanks to my dorm's stupid f***** rules.
For some reason dudes at my gym give me compliments about my muscles:
Who gives a fuck, I literally can't get a woman to like me regardless of being myself, what I do, what I say and how I say it, etc
All my loved ones (my family and bros) are back home, because I moved abroad for college to earn a Bachelor's degree for a medical field related major.
It would be very fun to go bowling with a girl 🎳, cook together 🍛🍝, hit the beach 🏖 and swim together and/or messaging her with sun-tan lotion.
Holding hands while walking together sounds fun too, playing guitar🎸for her also sounds exciting.
I'm sure relationships aren't a bed of roses, though it's still sounds worth it to me.
If I'm meant to be alone and devote my time and energy to score better academically, get my Bachelor's degree here in this cold, grey North-western European society (The Netherlands) for 4 years and keep hitting the gym for the rest of my life:
Then so fucking be it.
Also, bars and clubs aren't my thing.
Honestly, you'll see me at the gym, or at college, a library/bookclub instead.
I've tried everything: Tinder, Bumble, getting to know them in real life at bookclubs, etc.
I've had no matches, no success...
Judging by what I see pretty much every single day is that women here in The Netherlands don't go for guys like me
Women here go for white, light brownish men: who have a relatively nice car, motorcycle/scooter and clearly aren't foreign college students like me.
Thanks for reading.

Hi everyone. My wife and I are expecting twins at the end of May. We live in the US but both of our families are in Europe.
My wife’s mom is coming to help for the first few weeks, which I think will be great, specially because my wife will have a planned c-section. On the third week, her mom will go back home and we have the chance of having other family members to come help right after.
I am considering holding off help from further family members (at least until I start working) for a couple of reasons:

• We both will be home 24/7 as I won’t start working until August (babies will be 8-10 weeks old)
  
• We live in a 1 bed 1 bath condo, and while we really appreciate any help, we also value our privacy, our mental health, and at the end of the day they are guests that we feel obliged (even if it’s not needed) to treat them as such. A hotel is not a possibility due to finances after paying for an expensive flight. This is kind of the main point in our discussions.
  

Our families want to come in tandem to help and also to meet the babies, but we are considering telling everyone to wait (except her mom) for a few months until I go back to work. They coming is not a one time possibility, they would be able to come right after her mom leaves and then 2-3 months after when I come back to work if needed.
Are we out of our minds rejecting help taking into account the points above? For those of you with twins, did you feel that you needed the help 100% even if both parents were home? We are concerned that even if they help with household stuff and in general, the thought of all living in a very small place would do more harm than good in our mental health.
Thanks so much in advance!

So I’m trying to buy my first office chair rather than going for the gaming chairs as I’ve heard that they’re really bad and a waste of money so I’m looking for an ergonomic chair mainly suited for gaming and tasks that’ll require me to sit on my chair for a long duration. I found some ergonomic chairs on Amazon which I’m thinking of buying but don’t know which one to go for so thought of coming here to get some help. The budget is under £250 as it needs to be a very comfortable chair that’s worth the price and would last for a while. It also needs to be suitable for a short person like 5ft 6-7.
Some of them do have vouchers so I can get them for a lower price which I wanted to note. If there are also any other chairs that you’d recommend please let me know.
Deal: Amazon Brand - Umi Ergonomic Office Chair with Back Support, Breathable Mesh Office Computer Chairs with Armrest and Adjustable Headrest Desk Chair Work Home Office https://amzn.eu/d/3wiGdwz
SIHOO Ergonomic Office Chair Mesh Desk Chair with Adjustable Lumbar Support 3D Armrests Breathable High Back Computer Chair (Black) https://amzn.eu/d/0c1WVcf
Deal of the day: SIHOO Ergonomic Office Desk Chair, Swivel Computer Chair Height Adjustable Mesh Back Executive Home Chair with Lumbar Support, 90° Flip-up Armrest (Black) https://amzn.eu/d/cdPEV6u
Ticova Ergonomic Office Chair - High Back Desk Chair with Adjustable Lumbar Support, Headrest & 3D Metal Armrest - 130° Rocking Mesh Computer Chair https://amzn.eu/d/9x7Tyln

20 gallon reptile terrarium tank, a reptile hammock and container for worms. All for $100. Will send pictures if interested.
Tank and container- used for 2 months Hammock- barely used

My boyfriend and I have been dating for only two months and we've only tried having sex two times. TWO TIMES. Everytime I try to initiate he'd move my hand away, say he was tired or fall asleep. I feel deprived of sex. I feel unwanted. He wants to get married and have kids but we don't even have sex. If this is what it's going to be like during marriage then, I'm sorry, but I dont want it.
I just tried again tonight and now he's snoring as I type this. I want to leave and go home but he drove me to his place. What do I do?

last night i went out w friends… friends who know i don’t drink mind u. Got peer pressured to drink as usual but i just tasted some of frozen margarita like i had a quarter of the glass THANKFULLY avoided taking the shot even tho i was so pressured into it almost caved cause of my ppl pleasing. I did sip a bit more of my friends margarita tho cause it tasted good and i had already started. 💔 Got to my friends house her parents offered us a home made drink can’t say no to PARENTS tried to just sip it slowly and let my friends finish the rest once her parents left. Upset at myself because i think i got towards tipsy yesterday and felt myself kinda wanting to drink more which breaks all the rules and his so heart breaking w my progress so far 💔I hate how common it is to drink at ANY OCCASION, i hate how my friends don’t stand up for me to not drink and i HATE MOST OF ALL how i struggle to stand up for myself. I don’t even like drinking like yesterday i just felt more tired and headachey i just struggle w the pressure ppl put on me… do i have to restart my badge I REALLY DONT WANT TO and i’ve done so well 💔
please let me know ur thoughts thank you everyone 🥺

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