This is a new relationship. I’m 25M, she is 29.
Here’s the thing, she loves traveling, I personally hate it. Maybe because all the traveling trips I took as kid/teen with my parents left a sour taste in my mouth. That and I guess I never gained patience for sitting in a car hours on end, or going through the process of checking in at airports and waiting for you flight. In addition I’m a BIT of a anxious, neurotic mess of a person. Don’t enjoy leaving my comfort zone, and like growing and experiencing at my own slow pace. And on top of all that I have tinnitus, which limits me in being “fun”.
My girl is the opposite, she’s more confident, strong willed, extrovert, and loves traveling. We have talked about our thoughts, and I expressed hating traveling. When we talked about building relationship, she mentioned once it was important that we travel together once in a while. I agreed to make an effort, as long as she knew I had my limits, and also limited where I could go (loud places that are ear damaging for example, so concerts and clubs). But that I will make an effort to travel with her on trips.
Going out of town often I don’t mind, short trips to big cities a couple hours away. And we’ve already gone on one several weeks ago actually where we stayed the night.
Big trips that require longer travel and more days is where I start requiring a stronger will and energy. So last night she said that we should go to two different states at different months this year. I told her I wouldn’t be able to go to both.
She then replied “why cause of your limited days at work or money reasons”
Me: “both haha”. (Its true, i can’t take many days off work, limited sick/vacations days, and this year I started living alone, renting an apartment that eats up around 40% of my monthly take home salary).
Her: “haha well if would spend less stuff on dumb things like cigars or blu rays you’d have more money. You’re just afraid of getting out of your comfort zone”.
Right here is where my emotional state started changing to a bit of anger because I can feel the pressure coming from her. And I strongly dislike being pressured from anyone. And for some reason I’m surrounded by people who do that to me even when I say no decisively and don’t change my mind.
So I said “yes thats true, I don’t like to, yet here I am still offering to go on some trips with you, even if not at all”.
“Yeah i appreciate that a lot but you should come to both, we go on weekends so you don’t have to take many days off, and just stop spending so much”
“Look, most of my money goes to my apartment and groceries and bills, i can liberally spend money on maybe one hobby of mine, while the rest I can barely do due to lack of money. And in truth you know i dont like traveling, and only do it with you cause i know its important to you and want you to be happy. I can go on a few trips with you but there’s a limit for me and dont wanna feel pressured doing something im not comfortable with”.
She got more serious here and just said “yeah understood”
After that she said we won’t go to our out of town trips we had planned for the next month or two. I insisted that I wanna go to those with her, because I do, cause I know it’ll make her happy, and because even if I don’t like traveling I’m sure I can find interesting places to go to to enjoy myself. But she was stubborn and just said we dont have to do anything and that she really doesnt want to force me to do anything. She was saying considerate things but I can tell she was pissed and disappointed.
I said goodnight and fell asleep to avoid making the issue worse.
But yeah I don’t know if im the wrong here. Is it bad that I don’t like getting out of comfort zone? every time i try, I don’t like it. It can have its moments and I will enjoy myself sometimes but I really do prefer just doing my own thing and living in a smaller scope. I’ll do it for my girlfriend to make her happy and I know its important to her.
And Im not sure if my anger is justified. I know I can be boring and a homebody, but shit I always try my best to grow. Maybe at a slow pace but I don’t always stay in my show. Up utnil last october I had never driven out of town at all and was scared of the highway. Now Ive gone put of town 6 times since then. Living alone and doing my own chores sounded shitty to me but here I am, with my own apartment, learning to cook, do laundry, cleaning etc.
I understand I’m not mature or the ideal, but shit I try and have my small success, even if they come slow. Just sucks when somebody comes a long trying to speed up the process and demand more of you.

Company Name	Title	City
HelioHire	Senior Data Scientist	Austin
Peopleready	General Labor	Abilene
Edwards Mail Service	COMPANY SCA DRIVER ( part time 19.06 per hour) CLASS C BOX TRUCK	Abilene
Buttery Company LLP	Warehouse Duty / Delivery Driver	Abilene
The Oaks at Radford Hills	Licensed Vocational Nurse (LVN) PRN	Abilene
WIS International	Inventory Associate - Specialty (PT)	Abilene
Concentra	Lead Development Representative	Addison
Cogent Communications	Sales Manager, Addison, TX	Addison
Courtyard Addison Midway	Director Sales + Marketing Courtyard Addison	Addison
Authentix Inc	Warehouse Associate	Addison
Asset Living	Senior Accountant	Addison
Concentra	Medical Billing Specialist	Addison
Refuel Operating Company	C Store Team Member	Adkins
Pizza Hut	Delivery Driver	Alamo
Harvest of Aledo - A Civitas Senior Living Community	Wellness Director - Senior Living (LVN or RN Required)	Aledo
Grace Learning Tree	Nursery Teacher	Aledo
Brooks Brothers	Part-Time Sales Associate - Allen Premium Outlet 3724	Allen
Papa John's	Delivery Driver	Allen
DFW Home Health McKinney	Physical Therapist Assistant	Allen
Prairieland Detention Center	Detention Officer	Alvarado
Rent A Center	MIT Bilingual	Alvin
Coastal Eye Associates	Call Center Representative	Alvin
America's Best	Sales Associate - Bilingual Spanish	Alvin
Driveline	Flex Merchandiser	Alvin
Amarillo Center for Skilled Care	Dietary Aide	Amarillo

Hey guys, here are some recent job openings , feel free to comment here if you have any questions, I'm at the community's disposal! If you encounter any problems with any of these job openings please let me know that I will modify the table accordingly. Thanks!

Throwaway account.
I live in NDG on a very residential, very family type street. Semi-detached duplex. The neighbors here are the kinds who have lived here almost their whole lives, or buy, raise families, and stay for 30+ years. We all mostly know each other, each other's kids, and the houses that surround us.
The duplex that is attached to mine was bought a little while ago by a foreign family who does not live there. They've rented one half to a family with kids, but the downstairs was recently rented to someone else, and we suspect he's running a boarding house or halfway house type of thing. Without going into details, renter man hasn't been seen since the weekend, but a bunch of other people are living there - more people than there are bedrooms. They are different ages, races, genders, and definitely not family to each other or themselves. Without judgement attached, these people are rough looking, spend 24/7 going in and out of the yard smoking cigarettes, and there's already been one screaming match since they appeared 3 days ago. We can't speak to anyone over there since renter man is not around and is sketchy about giving information as well as having put up a fence to block ground level neighbors from seeing, upstairs neighbors don't speak English or French well and have resisted friendly gestures, and owner is who knows where.
I'm not even sure if it's legal to rent a home, then sublet each room out like this (ostensibly to make a profit)? Does this kind of thing require permits and zoning? I'm concerned that having more people than there are bedrooms living there it's also going to overload the electric and put our house at risk if there's a fire. Is there anywhere to call or submit a report to have this checked out?

(cross posted)

Vyvanse shortage!

📷
We live in nyc and can’t find Vyvanse of any dosage for our teen who has been in stimulants since 4 years old (you read that correctly! For kindergarten placement, thr neuropsychologist told us he needed to go to a school for kiddos on the spectrum who had enough adults to manage him unless he was on stimulants, because he wasn’t able to do any testing until he was on meds!)
We can’t even find short or long acting alternatives to Vyvanse (our dr would prescribe them)
To give you an idea of how much he needs it, his elementary school SPECIAL NEEDS school called us to pick him up the one day we forgot to give him meds. In high school he flunked a test the day he forgot to take them. (He is normally an A student, like most of you with adhd he is smart)
We are desperate. We have called my home state Maryland(even though our insurance will not cover it out of state) so that family could fedex it (as suggested by our pharmacist since others are doing it) but I can’t find it.
We have begged our mail order pharmacy. Nope. None.
We will go anywhere at this point, we will rent a car and drive or fly there, we have family in Ohio and California. We will pay full price, we will buy someone’s. (We are now using old pills with a lower dosage that we kept and supplementing with short acting Ritalin dr oked)
We are also willing to fly to Toronto Canada!
Can anyone tell us if your area has it?
He’s got testing coming out and he flunked a test earlier this year when he forgot meds (he is an A student when on his meds).
Help!! I know you guys will understand…
TIA

I’ve recently moved back to family in Rochester and my wife and i are doing light house hunting as we would love to have our own place but are in no hurry, and dont mind renting for a while.
We’ve previously lived in Austin TX and are familiar with the current home prices there. The houses here being sold in the east side suburbs of Rochester are going for 100k+ making these houses close to being sold at comparable levels to what we saw in Austin. But Austin is a high price booming city so it makes it seem ridiculous if prices are even comparable. The taxes are also wayyyy higher here, the tax burdens in buying houses this high is equivalent to buying million dollar homes in nyc.
We recently checked out a house where a local appraiser appraised it at no more than 300k, was listed at 230k and sold for over 400k cash.
There is no money incentives when you buy this high, you’re losing money, you’d make more money renting and reinvesting that 300k+ cash. You can rent a large house in a nice neighborhood in the school district you want and make more money off your re-invested cash. Usually you’d rather pay for a mortgage and taxes than sink money in rent but in this case your monthly payments + cash lost makes it utterly nonsensical.
It just boggles my mind and would like to get an understanding why people feel pressured to pull the trigger on these crazy offers.

I just found this sub today and feel it’s time to get some support with my gambling habits.
I am using my non-main Reddit account as my main account is not anonymous. I want to be able to share freely.
I (F36) am a severe alcoholic in recovery (8 months sober today!).
Many other compulsive behaviors have taken over since quitting alcohol on Oct 1, 2023.
I’ve gotten support for the others, bulimia, habitual THC use, and compulsive shopping, to name a few. The online gambling is one that I haven’t been able to shake on my own and it’s time.
I started online gambling about 4 months ago. Mainly blackjack. I more or less have been gambling away my paycheck every week, which has resulted in late rent payments, no savings, loss of productivity at work and home, and just a general bad mood.
From what I can tell, I gamble to zone out, combat boredom, and in hopes that lucky wins might solve my immediate financial needs. It’s pure insanity.
I want to stop before I hit rock bottom. I know from experience with my alcohol problems that rock bottom is a long, hellish way down.
Today is my first “real” day 1, and the urge to deposit money and gamble is strong. I’m new to this and can use any tips or encouragement you all may have.
Thank you

Hello community,
My wife cannot obtain her vaccine records from her home county.
My question is, for those of you who took the below vaccines for immigration, did you do them all in one day or are multiple doses required?
Tdap/Td
MMR
Varicella (Chickenpox)
Hepatitis B (required from birth to 59 years old, effective 8/12/22)
Influenza (Seasonal, required up to March 31, 2022)
Thank you in advance!

I’m not too sure where to start. I’ve had my two leopard geckos—Goldie (male) and Pepper (female)—for about eight years. Over the past three years, our living situations has changed quite a bit, and now we’re trying to search for apartments to get out of our current situation.
My mother, sibling, and I are moving and we already have two other pets that we have to take with us (possibly two cats, and a bird). Unfortunately, the apartments we’re looking at are not terribly spacious and I don’t think we’ll be able to fit two 20-gallon tanks amidst a bird cage and our cat amenities. Besides that, pet deposits are $250 each pet and pet rent is $30, and I’m still not sure if that will apply to my bird let alone two geckos. Beyond that, our electricity may run about $100 (per person) per month on top of our rent, and having heat lamps that constantly need to be plugged in may eat away at our budget. And not to mention cost of food and other expenses. We’re by no means wealthy, and we’re already going to be pushing it quite a bit with the pets we are bringing.
While nothing has been officially decided yet, I’ve been thinking about how we’d move with two leopard geckos for a while, and the more I think about it the less feasible it seems, especially since we’re looking to move into an apartment. And it seems like the best course of action—for ourselves and the geckos—would be to find them a loving home with someone who can give them the care that they need.
We live in north-central Florida, in Suwannee County. We’re going to be moving about an hour away. We’re looking to move by August at the earliest, and I want to try and find them a home a while beforehand so that we don’t have to scramble once the date is set.
If anyone is willing or knows someone who is willing to take in two adult leopard geckos (and has the experience to give them the proper care), I’d really appreciate you reaching out to me. They’d both come with all their equipment (tanks, heat lamps, hides, etc.) and food. I wasn’t encouraged to do much research when I first got them and I’ve spent the last few years fixing their habitats to the best of my abilities, and I’d love to see them go to someone who can give them an even better life than I ever could.
Thank you for reading, and any help would be appreciated. I’ll post their current set-ups soon and photos of the babies themselves. I’d greatly appreciate if anyone would be willing to help me find them a good home.

Hello personalfinance
33yo, single. I'm closing on a house next week and furiously (and enjoying) playing with numbers and creating a brand new shiny budget. At this point, I've only looking for ways to increase my income and save money and quickly get to 20% equity. I think I can do this within a year with an extra $500 towards principal. So far, I can only think to get a part time job and rent out a room or two. I know have to increase my emergency fund from 2 months expenses to about 4-6 months worth.
A huge swing of expenses are coming my way like furniture, kitchenware, toiletries, utilities, and taxes, etc. (I own like nothing from living at home for several years).
Do you have any other strategies/tips/tricks on how/where to save money and budget? Any advice to your younger self when you were buying your first home?
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Thank you!!!!!

Hey this is my (19F) first time making a post here and honestly I never thought I'd be making a post here and I was really nervous to post but I've realised a lot of things since being away from home. I'm in my second year of uni, currently going into third. Whilst here, I realised a lot of things that happened at home weren't normal like my Nmum (49F) threatening to not financially support me when I was young, screaming and threatening me when my grades weren't up to her standard, ignoring me for days on end when I disagreed with her, only giving love when I was up to her standard and having a less then healthy relationship with alcohol. However that's not what I've come to ask advice about.
My Nmum is currently paying for my accommodation at university and has promised to do so the entirety of my time at university. I went to a different city for university, which is about as hour's drive away. Today was supposed to be her last payment for rent before I take over paying for the summer. I wasn't actually supposed to stay during the summer, that was a decision I made by myself as last summer, I was so completely miserable at home that I was suicidal.
My Nmum has been spiralling since I have been away from home. She has been drinking much more, being more controlling then usual and constantly putting down my choices like my hobbies, my boyfriend and other things. We recently had an argument about visiting as I said I would visit her but to be honest I've been putting it off as I really don't want to go home. Today, I noticed she had not deposited the money for my rent. My Nmum is very sharp with money so I knew this wasn't a mistake and my little sister had said that in a drunken rant, she was thinking about cutting me off. I felt like this was a punishment for not visiting her and not talking to her.
I called her and she asked if I was only calling her about the rent or if I actually cared about her. She went on to say that she didn't realise she was paying this month. This wasn't true as I had sent her the rent schedule. I ended up saying that I would visit her this weekend. After the call, I felt manipulated and defeated. I want to confront her when I visit this weekend and talk to her about her manipulating me.
What could I say to her that will show that the reason why I'm angry at her isn't about the money but about the manipulation? I know she will try to argue that the only reason that I'm visiting or talking to her about this at all is the rent and that I wouldn't care or visit if she didn't pay the rent.
Please be gentle. I have only recently realised that my mother is like this and I didn't realise that it would get worse after I left. I do have a contingency plan put in place if she does cut me off but it's very subpar to my living situation right now. I understand how privileged I must sound, I can't help but think that this abuse isn't as bad as others and I live a relatively peaceful life. If you've read this, thank you so much, I really appreciate it.

John Wick: Chapter 2 is by far the best of the four films starring K eanu Reeves as the eponymous hit man, the first of the cycle that I’d recommend—albeit with an asterisk. The new film (which opens

Watch Here<> John Wick: Chapter 2 OnLine Free

Friday) has many of the same problems as its predecessors; although these problems are interesting, they’re far more fun to contemplate in the rearview mirror of thought than in the real-time forward motion of viewing. But something happens, fairly late in the game, that converts the film’s merely technical displays of bloody murder into something suspenseful and romantic, if no less silly. The details are too good to give away, but there’s no harm and much pleasure in considering how the movie climbs, slowly but surely, to that light-headed summit.
One of the curiosities of the John Wick series is that, as an entirely original creation dependent on no prior properties, it has nonetheless given rise to an alluring and self-perpetuating mythology of its own. The premise of Wickworld is cleverly paranoiac, built around the tentacular connections between the crude underworld of contract killers and the shadowy overlords who keep them in action. That wicked authority is called the High Table; it dispenses orders to kill on pain of being killed, ratifies contracts for murder, and brokers the deals for bounty hunters. It commands John to kill, and it sets him up to be killed, but it also sets the tone of the movie. The High Table exemplifies a super-élite of secret societies with elaborate rites, deeply rooted aristocracies, a flaunting of mind-bending wealth, and the executive ruthlessness of a transnational shadow government that has the power to wreak havoc in public with impunity.
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On 24th March 2023, Keanu Reeves starring JW4, is coming to your nearest theaters. This American neo-noir action thriller will be 169 minutes long and distributed by Lionsgate. Already, the official YouTube trailer is out, vibing fans' expectations!
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If you are looking for online stream options for this film, you may get updates soon. Also, which platforms can you rely on to watch this newest chapter of John Wick? We will uncover the info here!
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John Wick: Chapter 2 (2023) Release Date
John Wick: Chapter 2 will be out on 24th March 2023 in the US! However, this fourth installment of John Wick was initially scheduled to release on 21st May 2021. Nevertheless, due to the Covid-19 pandemic, the whole shooting got delayed, which impacted the official screening too.
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Also, the title cast- Reeves' had some agreements with The Matrix Resurrections (2021) at that period. In the meantime, John Wick: Chapter 2 (2023) official trailer was uploaded on YouTube on 10th November 2022 from Lionsgate Movies.
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When Is John Wick: Chapter 2 Coming to Movie Theaters?
John Wick: Chapter 2 will first debut exclusively in theaters on Friday, March 24, 2023. It’s hard to believe that this is nearly two years later than its originally intended release date of May 21, 2021!
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If you would rather wait to watch it from the comforts of home, keep reading below, so you can learn more about the movie’s streaming and home media release details.
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Is John Wick: Chapter 2 (2023) Streaming or in Theaters?
John Wick: Chapter 2 will first debut exclusively in theaters on Friday, March 24, 2023. It’s hard to believe that this is nearly two years later than its originally intended release date of May 21, 2021!
​
If you would rather wait to watch it from the comforts of home, keep reading below, so you can learn more about the movie’s streaming and home media release details.
​
When Is John Wick: Chapter 2 Streaming Online?
Streaming release dates can be quite unpredictable at times. Each streaming service has its own different practices in regard to when a new film can finally be released online, which may also be influenced by a film’s production company too. While John Wick: Chapter 2 is likely to be available for streaming on one of the major streaming platforms, its release date on streaming is still a bit of a mystery. It's a guessing game for now, but keep an eye on this space for future updates!
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Where to Watch John Wick: Chapter 2 (2023) Online?
As of now, the only way to watch Avatar: The Way of Water is to head out to the movie theater when it releases on Friday, Dec. 16. You can find a local showing on Fandango.
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Watch Now: John Wick: Chapter 2 (2023) Online Free
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Otherwise, you’ll just have to wait for it to become available to rent or purchase on digital platforms like Amazon, Apple, YouTube or Vudu, or available to stream on Disney+. Read on for more information.
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Is John Wick 4 on Netflix?
The streaming giant has a massive catalog of television shows and movies, but it does not include ‘John Wick: Chapter 2 .’ We recommend our readers watch other dark fantasy films like ‘The Witcher: Nightmare of the Wolf.’
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Is John Wick: Chapter 2 on Hulu?
No, ‘John Wick 4’ is unavailable on Hulu. People who have a subscription to the platform can enjoy ‘Afro Samurai Resurrection’ or ‘Ninja Scroll.’
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Is John Wick 4 on Amazon Prime?
Amazon Prime’s current catalog does not include ‘John Wick 4.’ However, the film may eventually release on the platform as video-on-demand in the coming months.fantasy movies on Amazon Prime’s official website. Viewers who are looking for something similar can watch the original show ‘Dororo.’
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Is John Wick 4 on HBO Max?
No, John Wick 4 will not be on HBO Max since it’s not a Warner Bros. movie. The company previously released its movies on the streamer and in theaters on the same day. However, they now allow a 45-day window between the theatrical release and the streaming release.
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Casts of John Wick: Chapter 2 (2023)
Can you imagine the very famous John Wick with Keanu Reeves? Expectedly, Keanu stars the title character- John Wick, with a bunch of other talented cast members, including Donnie Yen (Caine), Bill Skarsgård (Marquis), Laurence Fishburne (Bowery King), Hiroyuki Sanada (Shimazu).
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You will also get to see the following:
● Shamier Anderson asTracker
● Lance Reddick as Charon
● Rina Sawayama as Akira
● Scott Adkins as Killa
● Ian McShane as Winston
● Marko Zaror as Chidi
● Natalia Tena as Katia
● Aimée Kwan as Mia
● George Georgiou as The Elder
● Jackey Mishra as Gangster
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What Is John Wick: Chapter 2 (2023) About?
Remember the story when John Wick first got introduced? He searched for a man who invaded his home and stole his belongings in chapter 1. Then, chapter 2 portrayed John Wick's mission to assassinate a target. Finally, we saw him fighting his way out of New York in the latest chapter of John Wick back in 2019.
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This newest edition of the story will show how John will uncover the way to conquering The High Table. Moreover, here is the twist- John already has his new enemy full of powerful alliances worldwide. Can he conquer them like before? Or is there awaiting more fun and incredible stories to witness? Let us share asap once you watch this Chad Stahelski directorial!

Hello, I'm kinda new in Canada, I'm living in Ontario but that might change in the future, I've only been her for some years, I'm currently applying for my citizenship, I have a good job and income, but I've been renting since I got here.
I would like to buy a house or condo, I have some savings for down payment, but I have some questions

1. What if in a couple of years, before I pay the house in full I decide to live somewhere else? Can I sell what I've already paid and use it as down payment in the new place?
2. Should I consider staying in the first place for some amount of time or mortgage percentage and then think about moving?
3. I contribute to my wifes SRSP, could we use that for Home Buyers Plan, like a normal RRSP?
4. What's the minimum recommended percentage of the total house value for down payment?

Happy to chat if you need more details or something to clarify.
Thanks in advance

I'm hoping someone financially savvy can help to guide me in the right direction. First, here's my spouse (33F) and I's (34M) financial background:

• $205k income + $85k income from spouse ($14850/month take home after taxes, health insurance, current retirement contribution)
• Personal loan - $1k/month ($3k left at 5.0%, 3 months left on loan. Used to replace driveway before last winter)
• Student loans - $270/month ($21k left at 4.5%, 8 years left on loan)
• Rent + utilities - $3300/month ($440k left at 3.25%, 30 year loan)
• Daycare - $1100/month for a 4 year old
• College savings - $600/month
• Emergency funds - $8k (I had to nearly drain this at tax season due to my extra withholdings not being high enough, but that's fixed now. I'm currently adding 1k per month to this.)
• Current 401k/403b contribution for my wife and I - both at 4% with 2% employer matching
• Own both cars, one is getting old
• My work provides a pension of about 50% income replacement at retirement
• Additional income has been put towards house renovations and furnishing, which is nearly completed

I just started working as a medical professional, so this was my first year at full income. We bought a house after right after I accepted my job and put 20% down. We knew the house had an old roof when we bought it and ended up getting some water damage after a wet winter this year. Insurance is covering the interior damage repair, but I believe it's time to fix the roof before this becomes a recurring problem. I've gotten a couple estimates for the roof replacement, and it looks like it will be upwards of $50k for asphalt and $80k for steel.
I'm getting a 10% pay bump soon. My plan was to dump the new income into savings and max out my 403b, but given the urgency of the roof issue, should I try to pay off a HELOC/loan as fast as possible? I've shopped around and the best HELOC I've seen so far was at 7.5% for a $80k loan. It doesn't seem like my 403b gains would beat 7.5% but I also feel the need to save more after being in training for so long. I could balance the two out and squeeze my remaining budget more?
I appreciate any advice given.

Hello, I'm not sure where to ask this and/or how to proceed with my current situation. If this is not the appropriate forum, please point me in the right direction.
My spouse has been diagnosed with a serious medical condition which would require surgery. Since we both do not have any work from home option, we were initially planning to move to a 2BHK (currently, we are renting a 1BHK apartment) and bring one of our parents over for post-surgery care (which would be 4-6 months).
Unfortunately, we are unable to get accepted anywhere else (although we mistakenly didn't started looking at other areas), and our current 1BHK is due for renewal next week. It was due for renewal a month back, but after discussing with landlord, they agreed to wait for a month.
Now that we have run out of options and our grace period for renewal as well, we must renew our current place to not make it worse.
However, now that we won't be able to bring our parents for help, we are wondering, if NHS have any care providers for post-surgery recovery? If yes, are those covered within the NHS? If not, what kind of charges should I expect?
I'd appreciate any guidance in this regard. TBH, we are new to this country and not much accustomed with the options available (neither we are sure on whom to reach out or ask for suggestions)

I am currently having an existential crisis around my "high-functioning" autism diagnosis, and since I have no one else to talk to about this I am turning to Reddit for my existential rant to see if anyone can relate or how they coped. Feel free to skip to the "Existential Crisis" portion at the bottom if you don't want to read the backstory. Although honestly either way it's pretty long.
Backstory:
So, about ten years ago I was diagnosed with high functioning autism. I was nineteen at the time. Like many autistic women, I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety first. I only went for an autism evaluation in the first place because I was seeing a therapist at the time who was convinced I had autism. I thought that she was wrong, so in order to prove this, I went to get evaluated. This backfired marvelously as the evaluator also determined that I was autistic.
Around the time of the diagnosis, I googled high functioning autism symptoms and saw that it explained my sensory issues with sound, my social awkwardness, my love of pacing and swinging outside, my motor tic, and walking on my toes. It possibly contributed to my depression and anxiety. But I honest to god did not think it impacted my life beyond that. Nowhere in any of those articles did they mention the actual life outcomes for people with autism. In true autistic fashion I took "high functioning" literally. I assumed it meant that people with HFA could function at a high level and have a relatively normal life. No one ever explained what my diagnosis meant and I never received treatment or support for it. I just got the report in the mail and never saw the evaluator again.
So I continue going about my day and expect that I can have a normal life. I just carry around earplugs along with an unsubstantiated belief in my masking abilities.
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Cue that voice in Spongebob that says "Ten Years Later..."
My life is kinda garbage. I went to college right after high school, but I dropped out two years in due to becoming extremely overwhelmed and depressed, along with developing chronic migraines. I moved back home with my parents. Since then, I have only managed to work or go to school part-time. Last year, things were really looking up. My migraines had been under control for a few years. I finally graduated college and got off of disability. And I got my first full-time job. And burned out and quit within a few months. Just like everything else I have ever done. I then got another part-time job within weeks and the same thing happened. In fact, it's happening right now, I'm quitting my part-time job that I got after the full-time job because of how much it stresses me out and triggers my sensory issues.
I felt really bad about this. In addition to feeling more depressed and burned out than I have in a while, I just felt like I was a failure. Most people are more successful than me by my age. Sure I had my struggles with depression, but I had really believed that if I just worked really really hard, I could have a normal life and a full-time job and move out and have a partner and just be a successful, normal human being. All I did was try to meet that goal and all I did was fail. I tried all the depression medications, all the therapy but all it did was get me here. Every time I try to work for any prolonged period of time, I eventually become so overwhelmed and depressed I just have constant suicidal thoughts until I can't do it anymore. I either quit my job or check in to a psych ward. Rinse. Repeat. But it's not like I can just do nothing for the rest of my life so I feel like I have to keep trying. I don't know what else to do.
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Existential Crisis:
I was feeling like a failure due to getting yet another job and burning out yet again within a few months. At some point I was surfing reddit and came across this thread of how high functioning gifted autistic people cope. I ended up reading it in depth, since I'm this supposedly intellectually gifted high functioning autistic person even though I'm not coping very well at all. And all of the comments were like "I'm high functioning but even I can't hold down a full-time job."
I was shocked. And that's when I learn that "high functioning autism" doesn't actually refer to the level of daily functioning. It refers to support needs. "High functioning" autists have lower support needs than people with autism and intellectual disabilities. HFAs have autism but don't have an intellectual disability. That's all it means. https://www.spectrumnews.org/news/large-study-supports-discarding-term-high-functioning-autism/
Then I look up the life outcomes of people with "high functioning" autism and it is literally the most depressing thing I have ever read.
-80% of high functioning autistic people (HFAs) don't have a full-time job
-15% of autistic high school students graduate from college overall. Of those who do attend college, only 39% eventually graduate
-Most HFAs can't maintain (or sometimes even start) a long-term romantic relationship or marriage
-People with autism, even "high functioning" autsim, literally have the lowest employment rates of any disability. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s40489-014-0041-6
-Additionally, people with autism have the worst life outcomes of any developmental disability, and one of the highest rates of suicidal ideation at 66% https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lanpsy/article/PIIS2215-0366(14)70248-2/fulltext70248-2/fulltext)
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The odds are against even the "highest functioning" autists from graduating college, maintaining full-time employment, or getting married. I feel incredibly stupid, but I never knew this until now. And now every sandcastle plan for my life I ever had is collapsing. I'm having an existential crisis. I'm finally facing facts and beginning to abandon my delusional lifelong optimism and realizing that maybe there are things I just can't do, and it's not about how hard I try or how 'smart' I am. Like maybe I will never be able to work full-time and I should stop pushing myself to the breaking point over and over again, like Sisyphus bound to hell. I know you might be thinking, why did you have such a delusional level of optimism after so many failures? But I guess the answer is that it's what got me through the day.
For the first time I even began to question my ability to live with a partner, because after all I would have to be around them pretty much every day and would have a lot less alone time as a result. Could I actually handle that? What if I can't handle the things I think I can handle? I thought I could handle working full time or just life in general but I was obviously wrong about that. What if I'm wrong about other things I thought I could handle too? How is my life even going to go now?
I'm trying to figure out how I might be able to live off of part-time work, or how I could get into more freelance or work-from-home stuff so I could stand to work more hours, but my parents don't believe I have a real disability and are putting a lot of pressure on me. They say they're going to start charging me rent soon. I mean, they say they believe the official diagnosis, but they also say things like "Life is hard" and "You keep quitting things when they get hard. Can't you find a way to stop being such a quitter?" They think all of my career ideas are terrible and I feel like if I don't get my life together then I'm disappointing them. I did share HFA employment statistics with them, which they didn't know about before, but it didn't seem to change anything. My dad said I was using them to "portray myself as fragile." I would rather not live with them because they're pretty toxic and controlling tbh but I don't have anywhere else to go. I'm not exactly sure what I hope to gain by ranting about this but I guess I want to know how other people dealt with the horrible prognosis autistic people have. Did you know when you got your diagnosis about these statistics? If not how did you find out? Do you let the "average" prognosis define or affect you? Did it allow you to cut yourself some slack? Did other people in your life cut you the slack you needed too?

I reached out online about a house I saw listed for rent online (Redfin), and immediately got a call from a man claiming to be an independent property manager of the home. Online, there was no move-in date or pet policy, and when I asked about those things he immediately told me my desired move-in date (August) and pets would work prefect. He sent over the application and told me the application fee, and then called back twice within 10 mintues telling me to fill it out. When I asked him who the owner of the houe was, he told me a name different from who is listed on the Asheville GIS (I found using avlmap.ashevillenc.gov). I asked to set up a time to go see the home and he pressed me to fill out the application.
Also when I googled this manager's (unique sounding) name, nothing comes up except for an obituary and a few other random people across the country.
Obvioulsy I'm not going to send any $, but does this give anyone else big red flags?
It's hard out here y'all!
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Edit to add: I submitted a report to Redfin, hopefully they take the post down and get better about vetting their listings.

This absolute menace to society was definitely purposefully messing with me.
My fellow spider-lovers, I’ve gotta share this ridiculously stupid story with you; I have been on an odyssey with this dude.
His name is DC (Douche Canoe) and he really lives up to it.
In our last episode of “Get the Fuck Outta my House”, DC had successfully terrorized me into dismantling my entire sofa in an effort to locate him, only for him to briefly show up and wiggle a pedipalp in thanks for me putting it back together.
Following his brilliant Lilliputian victory, DC began a campaign of guerrilla-warfare like pranks. Almost every night, he’d wait til I let my guard down and became sleepy before appearing in the creepiest way possible. Usually he’d skitter across my arm. One time, my neck 😰. Once, I startled from my Netflix-induced waking coma to find my cat had cornered him, and I leaped so fast to prevent her from being bitten in self defense. I know DC, and he takes no shit; he’d go down fighting with every last twitch in him.
So, finally, I realized my evenings were turning me into Captain Ahab. Picture a 5ft tall woman with a jar, crouching in her living room in minimal lighting, staring at the culture of fruit flies on the sofa, waiting silently to pounce on my white whale of an arachnid while restraining a confused small dog on one side and a fly-hungry cat on the other. It was ridiculous.
Y’all, I dismantled and threw away the whole sofa. I wasn’t about to be spending my evenings hunting DC like a lunatic forever. I figured, fine, he wins, he can keep the sofa.
It had been broken for almost 6 months and was hurting my back anyway, so it wasn’t really only because of him, but I would have tolerated the broken sofa til the end of the summer at least.
I got a chair off marketplace, and had the sofa out and the chair in within one day.
It felt so good to sit on that chair and not need to look out for him.
Well, until that evening.
It was dark, only the TV was on, and my phone, which was resting on the armrest, lit up with a text message.
Lo and behold, the glow from my phone’s screen unveiled a familiar 8-legged silhouette.
I wasn’t even scared anymore. I just laughed. Soooooo loudly and deeply. And he didn’t even move! Just looked at me like “thanks for the new digs, lots of spider-friendly crevasses for me here.”
So, he got a tiny clog to nest in, and I spent hours putting enough ventilation (for a few days living in the jar) into the cork lid.
https://imgur.com/a/pcHwOfx
He also got two mealworms and got incredibly fat. Not that the weight slowed him down- he’s just buffer now.
So, the next day, I find out I immediately have to drive 12 hours to my hometown. I can’t release DC outside my apartment, cause I know he’ll just move back in, so I bring him and my pets in the car and make a plan to stop at a reserve that I know has a bunch of rotten logs for him to get comfy in.
Aaaaaand, my GPS fucks up. So DC comes with me across the country 🤦🏻‍♀️. At my parents, I’m still in the home range for parsons spiders, but then I start thinking, “what if spiders have dialects? What if I release my 8-legged white whale here in NJ and he becomes like that whale that sings at too low of an octave and he’s alone forever.”
At this point, I’ve bonded with the little asshole. Clearly, DC is an extrovert, and I can’t banish him to a lifetime of loneliness and failed communication techniques. Plus, what if he’s a she and she’s pregnant? Then I’m gonna end up causing some mad scientist type of founder effect on the parsons spiders in this new area. The biologist and spider enthusiast in me decided that DC would just have to travel back with me when I left.
So, DC and I have road-tripped across the country together, we’ve cuddled and watched Netflix (probably more often than I’m aware of). And now, he’s about to finally find his forever home on those rotten logs where he can harass the local insect population instead of me.
I’m kinda gonna miss the little fucker. And I’m not completely scared of parsons spiders anymore, either. Still gonna run away immediately after I open DC’s jar though 😅
Edit: changed “kiss” to “miss”. I am DEFINITELY no kissing him!!! Lmfao

I live in County Donegal not far from the border. I recently had my phone stolen, and went to the local garda station to report this. While there, I noticed from tracking that the thief crossed the border into NI. The garda officer mentioned it was not in their remit to confront the thief in this instance (which is somewhat understandable), however he mentioned even so that there are additional protocols that would have to be met, and he said that even in an active pursuit it's exceptional to enter the other jurisdiction without prior authorization.
I moved to Ireland recently from the US, and lived along the border with Canada. Similar to NI/ROI there is not a physical border in my region and the border isn't explicitly visible. Back home, the 911 dispatchers in both jurisdictions monitor one another and in emergencies police/fire/ems units will be dispatched/respond based on proximity to the emergency, regardless of the jurisdiction. Police can also continue a pursuit across borders and detain a suspect in their vehicle while waiting for the local police to arrive. If someone has a medical emergency or needs police assistance in an emergency in a border town here, would they theoretically have to wait for local units to respond that are 10s of miles away when a unit across the border might be 5 minutes away? It got me thinking how common it was for me to see Canadian police/fire/ems in my town back home and I don't think I've ever seen PSNI vehicles/NI ambulance service in the area ever.

Hello Mcat-ter's! I wanted to give my guide to how I got a 524 (132/130/131/131) last year (august 2022). I improved from my diagnostic which was a 497. This sub has been super helpful to me, and instead of writing secondaries I'm procrastinating by writing this post. So, lets get into it!
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0) A bit about me.
I'm a mostly traditional applicant (taking a one year research year (like 95% of applicants these days)). I took the test between junior and senior year over the summer. I go to a t20 school where I got pretty good grades (~3.9 gpa). Majored in humanities (not bio) so was a little weaker on the science parts, but really good at reading. Have always been a good test taker (34 I think on the ACT, 5's on all the AP's I studied for et.c.). Tutored students in chem. Tutored my siblings in like every science subject / math. I also REALLY knew my amino acids.
1) Disclaimers
First, I want to start of saying that this technique may not work for everyone. I put in a lot of time into studying, which may not be feasible for non-trads, those who have to work full time, those with families, et.c. Second, as you will see, I bought a lot of resources (like a lot). This was NOT cheap. Fortunately I saved up a lot of money before / during college and had my parents to help me out. Third, I was really determined to get an 99th+ percentile score. While a 520+ score is not going to hurt anyone, the amount of time / energy it takes may not be worth it for your application (another 200-300 clinical hours or volunteer hours may be better for your application)
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2) Non-Study Stuff that Set me Up for Success
My total study time was ~8 months. I studied part time during the spring semester, and then basically full time during the summer. I had a three day a week research internship (~20 hours per week). I basically studied 40-50 hours a week when I was studying full time. I deleted all social media. Blocked it on my phone (i think my total phone use per day went down to <2 hours a day (and that included using it for GPS to get places)). While this is probably not possible for most applicants, my internship was in a new city I had never been to / lived in. I therefore only knew like 2 people there (one of whom was my roommate). This meant I had to say no to basically no social engagements because, well, I didn't really have any friends there. While this was definitely super lonely at times, this also meant I wasn't getting pulled to go out and party (I'm usually pretty extraverted, so saying no to social events is hard for me). Obviously, moving to a new city is probably not in the cards for most people, but it was probably cheaper in the end than staying in my college town (where rent is not only higher, but the cost of going out / hanging out with friends).
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3) The Resources
As I said above, I used a F*** ton of resources:

1. Princeton Review 513+ Guarantee Course (ok, I know people are probably going to think I'm a troll for this, but I really found it helpful (for the most part). Personally, I found their cars strategy to be super helpful (again I know people are going to think I am a troll, I promise I'm not). I also found their science videos / the biology classes to be super helpful (I knew actually 0 anatomy before studying). Our physics instructor was great, the psychology one was kinda meh. This class included all of the princeton review text books + online quizzes + vides + all the AAMC resources+ a couple other things I'm probably forgetting. If I had to do it again, I would probably have done a slightly slower paced class ( I did the five day a week, 3 hour a day class (probably would have done 4 days a week)). I also would NOT have gotten the 513 guarantee .
2. Princeton Review Science Workbook (This was also from Princeton Review course). This was probably in the top 2 most helpful resources (besides AAMC). This book is probably 1000 pages of pure practice passages. I legitamately did every single bio / biochem passage and I credit it for 5 points on my MCAT. If you can only get one resource (besides AAMC) this is what I would get.
3. Kaplan Review Books. Pretty Self Explanatory. I would rotate between reading these and the Princeton. These are less dense than the princeton ones and are pretty good if you already have a strong foundation. These also came with a qbank and some practice tests which I found super helpful.
4. Kaplan quick sheets. This was included in the Kaplan Review Books, but also deserves its own line. This does a great job of summarizing all the major topics. In all honesty, if you are good at test taking and have this thing memorized fully, I truly think you can get minimum 508 on the test
5. Blueprint full lengths + qbank. I found this one super helpful. I probably wouldn't have bought 10 tests in retrospect (they were having a sale), but I found that you could do sections of the tests to be super helpful for practicing sections of the test I was weaker at.
6. Blueprint half-length diagnostic. It's Free! and a great place to see what your baseline is (don't waste an AAMC test on that)
7. Berkeley Review (I got these for free from a friend). I found their cars practice to be super helpful. Their explanations are super in-depth which are really good if you are not getting a topic. I found their physics questions to be super good practice. I leafed through the biochem book a couple times, but otherwise didn't use them too much (mostly because I had so many other resources).
8. Khan Academy. These have good videos for when you are not understanding something. The practice questions / passages are also pretty good.
9. JackWestin Cars Pretty good to get a hang of timing, but the logic is not super reminiscent of AAMC. I did them for the first couple months of part time studying, but stopped for the most part once I got to full time studying
10. AAMC content outline and Jack Westin Content Outline. Probably most underratted resource. The content outline gives you everything that could be on the test. You should at least look at it. Jack Westin has filled the entire thing out for you. It is SOOOOOOO clutch (literally this made up the other 50% of my success on B/B.
11. Anki / Flashcards. I used milesdown. Thought it was good overall (didn't get through all the cards). Milesdown also has a review sheet that is REALLY good. 100% recommend. I also used an amino acid deck to really drill them (this I finished, and probably reviewed all the cards 5-10x). I also did a physics / chem equations flashcard deck.
12. 100 page psych doc. I thought this was good overall. 300 felt too long / too detailed for me
13. AAMC resources. All of them (except for ¾ sections of the sample, but that was because I was too tired, and found resting to be more important for my success). I also reviewed every answer.

What I didn't use:
Given the gigantic list of resources, you all are going to laugh, but probably the only thing I didn't use was UGLOBE, lol. Mostly, its because I ran out of time + I felt really good about my level of prep. A lot of people like UGLOBE but it wasn't for me. YMMV and it probably is a good resource, I just didn't use it.
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Study Methods:
I studied about 700 hours total (a lot, I know).
about 1 year before start of studying I took the Blueprint half-length. I got a 497 on this (125/126/121/125). I hadn't taken all the pre-reqs yet so I was pretty content with this score (ngl), but I def needed more content review.
Start of Part Time Studying:
I started part time studying over winter break. I started with a diagnostic test (Kaplan). I got a 506 on this (127/127/125/127). From there I started by reviewing the Kaplan books (reading them through and writing notes). I would take the end of chapter quizzes. I would make a flashcard for any question I got wrong. I also did the Kaplan science assessment which gave me a better idea of my areas of weakness in the sciences (my scores were between 8/30 for biochem and 25/30 for psych). I also did daily jack westin CARS.
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When I went back to school, the pace of studying definitely slowed. I studied less. I took another kaplan FL in feburary and got EXACTLY the same score again, which was disheartening. I pretty much took all of march / half of april off, and then restarted studying end of april. I then restarted studying in april, still part time. During this time, I continued reading kaplan, doing Khan academy practice questions, and anki.
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Full time studying:
I started full time studying May 1. On average I studied 5hours a day on the days I had work, 8 hours a day on the days I didn't, took a practice test on Saturdays (reviewed half of it that evening (I really think you should review cars right after you take it, otherwise you loose understanding of the reasoning you thought). I would usually review the second half of the exam the following day, and only study 3-4 hours on Sunday.
This was a very succesful strategy for me. The PR class has you take an AAMC practice test as your baseline and I scored a 513 on this (130/129/127/127) which obviously I was stoked about and gave me a ton of confidence.
When my princeton review class started, I did the 3 hour class, the majority of the reading, and about 50% of the suggested practice. Occasionally, during parts of the class I really understood (like gen chem), I would practice other sections. During this time, I took a full length every week, did flash cards, read berkely review for the stuff I didn't understand, did KA practice questions, did the Kaplan / Blueprint Q-Banks. I did this for about six weeks.
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For the last 6 weeks of studying, I finished up the PR class, and started AAMC. The other important things I did (which are kinda unique?) which I truly think helped me succeed are 1) I wrote out every single word of the Kaplan quick sheets by hand, 2) I wrote out every single word of the Miles Down quick sheets by hand, 3) I looked up the weirdest mnemonics for everything and texted them to my long distance SO / told them over facetime; Laughing over them and sharing them really made them stick 4) I read every single word of the JW content outline aloud. My roommates definitely thought I was crazy ( I definitely sounded it) but this definitely helped like 1000%. Legitimately, the bio question I am 100% sure I got wrong (and likely the reason I got a 131 and not a 132) was from the one sub-sub-sub section that I said screw it, this isn't going to be on the test.
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I continued doing a practice test each week. I reviewed all of the AAMC materials.
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For the week before the test I took things pretty easy, I reviewed everything super leisurely. Bio was still what I was struggling with so the only thing I did practice test wise was take the Sample Bio (which I got a 58/59 on so a 132). I didn't do the rest of the sample because I was feeling kinda burnt out.
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A note about full lengths:
I took full lengths almost exactly in testing conditions: no referencing notes, wearing the same outfit (down to the socks), eating the same meal, same time of day, same weird whiteboard thing, wore a mask (you had to when I took it, not sure if its still the same) et.c. However, I did practice with certain (distractions). I tried to mimic, what happens if I had five minutes fewer due to a malfunction, what if my pen doesn't work, what if a loud alarm goes off, et.c. This allowed me to prepare incase anything went wrong.
My Practice Tests (in order, including ones where I only did a section):
Blue Print Half Length Diagnostic 497 125 126 121 125
Kaplan Science Assessment N/A N/A N/A N/A N/A
Kaplan Practice test 1 506 127 127 125 127
Kaplan Practice test 2 506 127 127 125 127
Blueprint Practice test 10 126 127
AAMC FL1 513!!!! 130 129 127 127
Blueprint Bio Only practice test 1 129!!!
Princeton Review FL 1 512!!! 127 129 127 129!!
Princeton Review FL 2 508 :( 126 127 127 128
Blueprint Chem/Phys Only practice test 1 129!!!!
Blueprint Cars Only practice test 1 128
Blueprint P/S Only practice test 1 129!
Blueprint Practice test 2 517!!!!!!!! lets go! 131 (WTF, how????) 128 129 129
Blueprint Practice test 3 515 129 128 129 129
AAMC FL2 519!!!! 130 130! 130! 129
AAMC FL3 519!!!! 130 128 130 131!
AAMC FL4 524!!!!!!!!!!!!! 132!!!!! 132!!!!! 128 :( 132!!!!!
AAMC Sample, biology only 131!!!!!!!!
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AAMC average (519)
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Test Day
The day before test day I slept in a motel Literally in the same strip mall as the testing center. I went there the day before to ensure that I knew where it was and to ask them a couple of questions. While you only need one form of photo ID I made sure I had two just in case. I woke up early, did a couple jumping jacks, chugged an iced coffee (big mistake, I had to pee SOOOOOO badly during C/P (but maybe thats the reason for the 132, who knows)). Got to the testing center early (was the first one). I had pretty good timing for the test (except cars, had only like 4 minutes for the last passage). I finished P/S 40 minutes early, because I was tired and just done. However, I thought I FAILED when I came out of the testing center. No lie, I almost voided (THANK GOD I DIDN'T). I went back to my hotel, cried my eyes out, and went home.
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Score result day:
Again, I thought I failed, I was very pleasantly surprised when I got my score back ( I also cried). Was super happy to NEVER have to take this stupid test again.
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whew! That was long. Super happy to answer questions you all might have on my (insane, ngl) study schedule.
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Wishing everyone 528's